Stats on Pats Weekly by Raleigh Dugal, southcoast247.com correspondent
Freudian Slip: Belichick Still Big Daddy In AFC East
While the dying Red Sox slugged out a meaningless win over the Yanks, hungry sports fans got to watch the Patriots beat up on jerks from New York in a game with a purpose. Jets Head Coach Eric Mangini dropped his first official challenge to Bill Belichick, 24-17, and sulked like a little girl during the post-game handshake when he dead-fished his former mentor and scurried quickly away.
Despite the loss, Mangini didn’t have too much to cry about. The Pats managed to flip the script from last week, shutting the Jets out in the first half and putting up 17 of their own. Corey Dillon (RB) opened up the scoring with a one yard TD smash up the middle, rookie Chad Jackson (WR) made a flashy catch in the back of the end zone after dropping one that could have been even flashier, and Steve Gostkowski fleshed things out with a 20-yard field goal and the two extra points, fostering credibility in the Patriot wisdom that dependable kickers have uber-long last names that are way too fucking hard to pronounce.
But after the half it was all Jets. When rookie Lawrence Maroney (RB) popped his TD cherry to bump it up to 24-0, it pissed off the struggling home team enough to finally do something. Chad Pennington (QB) took just two minutes to respond with a 71-yard TD pass to Jerricho Cotchery. After getting housed by a couple of Patriot DB’s, Cotchery pulled off some serious Matrix moves and squirmed out on a sprint to the end zone. Tom Brady took a couple of dumps, first fumbling after a blind-sided hit reminiscent of Week 1 in Buffalo, then tossing a pick intended for double-covered ex-Raider Doug Gabriel (WR). Afterward, Laverneous Coles (WR) capitalized, juking the shit out of the Patriot secondary as he bobbed and weaved his way to a 46 hard TD reception and smoothing things out to a formidable 24-14.
All for naught. Though the Jets eked out another field goal to drop their deficit to seven, the Pats weren’t done. Dillon and Maroney teamed up to munch away at the clock, prompting announcers to dream up New England-related nicknames for the tandem, such as “Two if By Sea” and other horribly hokey bullshit. The Jets ended up getting the ball back after blocking a Gostkowski field goal attempt, but Tedy Bruschi (LB), back in action with a cast bearing striking resemblance to the Nintendo Power Glove, snatched up an interception and put a boot in the neck of their final drive.
Still showing some pains of being Branchless, Tom Brady made things look promising by airing the ball out like dirty laundry, spreading it to seven different receivers for 211 yards. With two running backs with the capability to combine for a hundred-plus yards rushing (145 on the day), count on the Pats to keep running a viable offense brandishing more weapons than a third world country.
They’ll need them. Next week New England should bring plenty of baggage to Denver even though the game is in Foxboro, as the Broncos knocked them out of the hunt for Super Bowl XL last season. It’ll be a squeaker, but look for the New England D to finally come up big with some scores against the wily-or-just-stupid Jake Plummer. Pats 27, Broncos 14, or the Pope shows up at the Catwalk Thursday night.
Tell me, Tell me. josh@southcoast247.com.
While the dying Red Sox slugged out a meaningless win over the Yanks, hungry sports fans got to watch the Patriots beat up on jerks from New York in a game with a purpose. Jets Head Coach Eric Mangini dropped his first official challenge to Bill Belichick, 24-17, and sulked like a little girl during the post-game handshake when he dead-fished his former mentor and scurried quickly away.
But after the half it was all Jets. When rookie Lawrence Maroney (RB) popped his TD cherry to bump it up to 24-0, it pissed off the struggling home team enough to finally do something. Chad Pennington (QB) took just two minutes to respond with a 71-yard TD pass to Jerricho Cotchery. After getting housed by a couple of Patriot DB’s, Cotchery pulled off some serious Matrix moves and squirmed out on a sprint to the end zone. Tom Brady took a couple of dumps, first fumbling after a blind-sided hit reminiscent of Week 1 in Buffalo, then tossing a pick intended for double-covered ex-Raider Doug Gabriel (WR). Afterward, Laverneous Coles (WR) capitalized, juking the shit out of the Patriot secondary as he bobbed and weaved his way to a 46 hard TD reception and smoothing things out to a formidable 24-14.
