By Craig P. Dixon, southcoast247.com correspondent Social Commentary 103
March 22, 2007
Controversy is always a big selling point at theatres. The furor surrounding
"Brokeback Mountain" drew me to review the poorly written, decently acted,
superbly directed film. I watched "Borat" regardless of the controversy, but
I'm sure the supposed lawsuits and uproar surrounding the movie didn't hurt
ticket sales.
When the Frank Miller graphic novel "300" hit the screen, it
was another "Borat" situation. I was going to watch the movie no matter the
potty talk. And when the Iranians (Persians) got all pissed off about the
film's depiction of Persian culture and East vs. West subject matter, I
thought only one thing.
BONUS! I can write a column about this!
Happy Iranians look like angry Iranians.
I've never
thought of Iranians as a very happy people. Every image I've seen shows them
burning American flags, burning President Bush effigies, or firebombing
American corporations. Fire and anger. Death to the Great Satan. Death to
Jews. The Holocaust never happened. And so on.
So, hearing that the
Iranians were mad again didn't surprise me. They're always mad. But the fact
that they're upset at a movie putting the great Persian Empire in a bad
light seems ludicrous. And would be... if they weren't so damned serious
about it. They've declared "300", "Part of a comprehensive US psychological war aimed
at Iranian culture".
I can empathize with the Iranians. Truly, they've had little glory as a country since the
Persian Empire. For centuries they've longed to reclaim that glory, and any
unseemly depiction of Persia is almost as bad as an attack on the country
itself. This is a country that still hates Alexander the Great because he
destroyed Persia more than 2000 years ago. The wound still festers to this
day. Old grudges die hard.
To my knowledge, I'm not Iranian. Nor am I
Greek. So, I technically can go into "300" racially
unbiased.
Xerxes offers Leonidas a back
massage.
Ideologically, I side with the Greeks, the seat of Democracy,
over the Persians and their sweeping monarchy. For historically, if the
Greeks, along with the legendary 300 and the Athenian navy, hadn't held the
Thermopylae pass for those three days, Greece as a whole wouldn't have been
able to retreat and regroup. The Athenian navy under Themistocles never
would've defeated the Persian fleet at Salamis. Greece would've been a
Persian holding. Alexander the Great would never had assembled the forces
necessary to conquer Persia. And that, folks, would've been the end of the
West, and Democracy. With these preconceived notions in mind, I watched the
movie.
I was more horrified by the historical inaccuracies than the
depictions of either side. What're the kids going to think?
Furthermore, I'm worried about the future of American moviemaking. All this green-screen CG bullshit is a
Pandora's box. Now that it's open, we may be fucked.
But, I can also see why Iranians are pissed. The film portrays them, literally, as monsters. A
huge, deformed eight-foot chained brute walks into battle alongside the
fearful Persian masses. When released, he kills his own mates as viciously
as he attacks the Spartans. A grotesquely obese man with swords for arms
lops the heads of Xerxes' generals after their second day of failure.
Legions of masked leprous soldiers make up the Immortals, the Persian
Special Forces.
And the 9-foot-tall God-King Xerxes comes off as a
homosexual. The lone Persian social scene depicts an orgiastic debauch where
he sways the deformed Spartan Ephialtes to the Persian side for riches and
romps with Persian chicks.
This whole depiction would be comparable to,
say, the Iranians making a feature length film about George Washington,
depicting him as a dandy homosexual who won US freedom by offering his
supple lips and ass to the British officer corp in exchange for American
victory.
Some of us would be infuriated. Some wouldn't give a shit. Others
would ask, "Who's George Washington?"
Meow.
The whole uproar of East vs. West
seems off. Instead of the Persians playing the role of East and the Spartans
West, the US could easily be substituted for the Persians, whilst the
smaller Iran could be swapped for the Spartans. Or US vs. Iraqi insurgency,
terrorism, etc. Then again, the Spartans could just be Spartans and the
Persians, Persians. But where's the fun in that?
Sometimes, a comic book's
just a comic and movies are just movies. And stupid movies at that.
Developed purely for entertainment value, these films are like the WWE: All
show, no go. Digging deeply into such displays for higher meaning gets you
absolutely fucking nowhere. In fact, one should attempt to shut off his
rational, thinking mind during such expositions.
Unfortunately, this isn't
entirely possible. Interpretations of a film, like interpretations of any
religious, historical or literary text, are numerous and in the mind of the
beholder. But turning an interpretation into a political issue, or worse, a
motive for action, is a dangerous, and possibly false, judgment that beckons
embarrassment.
Don't believe me?
Controversy is always a big selling point at theatres. The furor surrounding
"Brokeback Mountain" drew me to review the poorly written, decently acted,
superbly directed film. I watched "Borat" regardless of the controversy, but
I'm sure the supposed lawsuits and uproar surrounding the movie didn't hurt
ticket sales.
